


One Step Forward

by egoanesthesia



Category: Schitt's Creek
Genre: Alexis Rose Being a Good Sister, Angst with a Happy Ending, Anxiety, Based on a Sam Smith Song, David and Alexis really do love each other, David experiencing an anxiety attack so be warned, David likes to overthink, Fluff and Angst, M/M, Post-Episode: s03e13 Grad Night, Very New Relationship
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-09
Updated: 2020-09-07
Packaged: 2021-03-05 19:15:28
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,229
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25810456
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/egoanesthesia/pseuds/egoanesthesia
Summary: A series of little glimpses into the 'steps forward' in David and Patrick's relationship.  These will most likely not be in order.
Relationships: Alexis Rose & David Rose, Patrick Brewer/David Rose, Stevie Budd & David Rose
Comments: 18
Kudos: 69





	1. Cuz I’m Never Gonna Heal my Past if I Start Running Every Time It Starts

**Author's Note:**

> Hey friends!
> 
> I'm back with another David and Patrick piece! I've honestly never been more inspired to write than I am by these two, it's a great feeling!!
> 
> This is a fill for the first of two lyric prompts from the song Say It First by Sam Smith sent to me by my lovely friend, Alicia, from twitter <3 
> 
> This chapter is the heavier/angstier of the two but they both end happy/hopeful, I promise!!
> 
> Early relationship fics are challenging for me so I really hope this is enjoyable!
> 
> Thank you to my amazing friend, who will remain nameless, for reading this over for me <3
> 
> Chapter title from Say It First by Sam Smith and work title from Not Meant to Be by Theory of a Deadman.
> 
> Alright, enjoy!!

"Goodnight, David."

"Goodnight, Patrick."

David smiles to himself as he steps away from the car and slowly walks toward his motel room. Just before he opens the door, he turns around and sends a smile and a tiny wave in Patrick's direction. Patrick returns the gesture and then pulls out of the parking lot as David enters the room, smile still pulling at his lips.

He barely has time to set his things down before Alexis is handing him a flower and their parents are coming into the room singing and presenting a cake. There's a lot going on and he's caught up in the antics of his family. Eventually, the whirlwind of things that can only be present when relating to the Rose family dies down when his mother goes off to take her nighttime pills with his father following close behind her, and Alexis taking her turn in the bathroom to get ready for bed.

As he waits his turn for the bathroom, David takes a seat on his bed. The smile that he had been trying to contain since he entered the motel room after the date reappears on his lips and he sighs contentedly. His phone buzzes with a text and he hurriedly checks it. It's Stevie.

**S: how’d the rest of your date go ;)**

_D: oh my god you're the worst_

**S: well you didn't correct me so i take it i was right...it was a date**

_D: fine….it was...._

**S: and…..**

_D: why are you like aggressively questioning me?? just because you might have interpreted correctly that he asked me on a date and are probably the reason i had the confidence to kiss him doesn't mean you get to HARASS me!!_

**S: ohmygod!!! you KISSED??**

_D: um yes...he drove me home and i kissed him so...._

**S: david!!! i like this for you okay!!**

_D: i’m just....i don't wanna fuck this up stevie...._

**S: david, you won't fuck it up**

**now go to bed i'm done with the sincerity tonight i'm gonna go take a shot**

**best wishes and goodnight**

_D: warmest regards_

As soon as he sends the last message, thebathroom door opens and Alexis comes out. "Okay well I'm going to bed David I have a busy day tomorrow doing like a lot of stuff so...night!" She says as she makes herself comfortable under her blankets and unlocks her phone, scrolling through Instagram. "Night Alexis." David says and picks up his pile of pyjamas and things he set out for his shower and night routine before heading into the bathroom and locking the door. 

He makes it through the shower and the first three steps of his skincare regimen almost on autopilot and then it hits him all at once as he reaches for the next product. He kissed Patrick. He kissed his fucking business partner. 

The small bottle of product slips out of his now shaking hands and lands with a small bang in the sink. David can feel his breathing quicken and his body start shaking. It's a panic attack. He grips the edge of the sink tightly and tries to take deep, heaving breaths in and out to calm himself down.

How could he have done this? How could he have been so careless and kissed his business partner? What will happen when Patrick decides he's moving on? No one ever stays with David, why would they? He has just fucked up the one good thing in his life as well as his business and now he can feel himself crying and his breathing is more shallow than before and oh my fucking god this is not good at-

His mental spiral is cut short by a sharp knock on the door. "David! I can hear you breathing from out here. I'm trying to sleep what the hell?" Alexis' voice rings out in a hiss. David does not have the energy to argue with his sister right now. He is so exhausted and anxious and he still can't fucking breathe. He tries and ultimately fails at stopping the sob that escapes his lips. His hand shoots up to cover his mouth even though he knows that the damage has been done and Alexis has heard him crying.

"David you don't have to tell me what's wrong but can you like come here so I know you're like...okay?" Alexis says and knocks on the door again. David takes a deep, shaky breath and fumbles with the lock and doorknob before it finally opens. Alexis is standing right outside the bathroom door leaning against the wall. "David what happened?" she asks, trying to act like she isn't worried. 

"Nothing. Just thinking." He says and moves past her to get into his bed before his unsteady legs can give out on him. He falls onto the bed gracelessly and maneuvers himself into a ball of blankets with only his head poking out. He's hoping Alexis will take the hint that he is not in the mood for talking right now but, if there's one thing Alexis is, that's stubborn. She walks over to David's bed and sits down beside him.

"Alexis...not now..." he says and hears her breathe in ready to speak, so he forces out a whispered "please." "David you won't be able to sleep if you keep panicking. I promise I won't make fun of you no matter how stupid it is...or how much you're overreacting...or-" "Alexis!" he cuts her off sharply, patience wearing thin as a result of his anxiety. "Okay, sorry. I'm serious, David...just tell me." She says sincerely.

He peeks out a her over the blankets and there's a strangely serious and somber look on her face. He takes another deep, shaky breath and forced himself to sit up with his back against the headboard. "It was a date." He blurts. She looks at him with confusion written on her face. "Last night...dinner with Patrick. It was a date. He took me on a date on my birthday and in true me fashion, I almost fucked it up before it even began. I invited Stevie because I didn't realize it was a date and I guess I didn't want to admit I hoped it was so I went for classic self sabotage instead but Stevie figured it out and left and then we continued the date and he drove me home and I kissed him. I fucking kissed my business partner in his car and I cant stop thinking about how much this is gonna hurt when he decides I'm not worth it anymore. No one ever stays." He chokes out the last sentence with a sob. 

He didn't intend on saying all of this out loud, especially to his sister who he can guess will find some way to use it against him in the future when she isn't feeling as nice as she is right now, but he can't even bring himself to care because it's the truth. It's _his_ truth: no one ever stays with David Rose, he's too much and it isn't worth it.

“David…" He hears Alexis' voice break through his sobs but doesn't immediately look at her.

"David!" she repeats and he knows he has no choice but to meet her gaze. "What?" he says, trying to sound defensive but he doesn't have the energy left for that so it comes out sounding almost wounded.

"David, you know that the people you used to date were assholes. They used you for things; money, fame, your galleries...but they didn't actually care about you. Patrick does. David, he's different." Alexis says. "I know...I know Patrick isn't an asshole but all I can think about when I think about dating him is how it's gonna end. I keep thinking about Anthony, Olivia, Josh, Andrea......Sebastien, and Kate...fuck the last two make me wonder if anything is worth it." David sighs as a new wave of quiet sobs escape his lips.

"David, you've said it yourself, Kate and Sebastien were monsters...and the rest of your exes weren't good people either. Patrick is a good person though." Alexis says, a tiny smile playing at her lips. He takes a shaky breath and reaches a hand up to wipe away the tears. "I know...but no one has ever stayed, Alexis. I don't want to admit this because it's only been hours since we've started this...thing...and it's terrifying but I'm not sure I'll survive if Patrick and I stop whatever this thing is." He says shakily.

"David, listen to me. You're not gonna ever find someone to make you happy if you keep running away. I know you have like a horrible track record, but Patrick is a sweetie and you'd be screwing yourself over big time if you didn't give this a chance. Who knows, David, he could be the one..." Alexis says, booping his nose with a dreamy smile on her face.

"I don't even know if there is anyone out there meant for me." David says self-deprecatingly.

"David, you're overthinking this. Let yourself be happy. Now, get some sleep, you have work tomorrow and I'm exhausted so I'm going to bed too." Alexis says, booping his nose again as she rises from the bed and makes her way to her bed.

"Goodnight. Thanks Alexis." He whispers the last part. She just smiles in response and then turns over to fall asleep.

David makes himself comfortable again beneath the blankets and is about to close his eyes when his phone buzzes on the nightstand. He picks it up and sees a text from Patrick.

**P: I had a great time tonight David! Thank you again. See you in the morning, coffee on me! Sleep well xx**

_D: Thank you Patrick. I had a lovely time as well. Goodnight xx_

David can't help the small smile that appears on his lips as he sends his reply and places his phone back on the nightstand.

He settles into a comfortable position and let's his eyes fall shut. Maybe this time will be different. Maybe Alexis had a point when she said that he's never going to find his person if he keeps running. In his past, running away and distancing himself from all potential and existing partners had been his only way of dealing with the fallout of heartbreak and pain that would inevitably come his way when whomever he was seeing left him for someone better, or sometimes just because. 

But maybe this is his chance to make it better? He tries not to be too hopeful because his track record proves otherwise, but maybe Patrick is the one who will stay.

David falls asleep eventually, hopeful thoughts of what a future with Patrick may hold if he just lets himself have this, just this once. 

From the time he wakes up until the time he finally heads off to work is pure chaos. There's a dead fucking body in one of the rooms that has his father and Stevie freaking out. His mother is being her usual self which, as much as he does love her, is not helpful. Even Alexis' gracious attitude from last night seems to have dissipated with her "do not mess this up" comment before he left. 

But in a strange way, it might actually help. Everyone is acting normal but his entire world has changed. He's allowing himself to have a tiny bit of hope that maybe the shitshow that had been his past might be over with Patrick. 

He allows himself to think that maybe, just maybe, he can slowly heal from the shit his exes put him through with Patrick's gentle smile, soft kisses, honey eyes, and tight hugs.

When he walks through the front doors of Rose Apothecary the next morning and sees Patrick restocking product on one of the shelves, his breath catches as a sense of warmth washes over him at just the sight of Patrick. 

One step forward. Maybe he _can_ heal his past and maybe the healing comes in the form of his beautiful, kind, and all around amazing business partner, Patrick Brewer.


	2. I Need to Hear You Say Those Words If I'm All That You Desire

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Patrick does some thinking about the word "boyfriend".  
> Inspired by S4Ep4 Girls Night

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi everyone,
> 
> Okay this one has been sitting in my drafts unfinished for weeks because I couldn't seem to perfect it but it's finally here.
> 
> This ones is for my lovely friend, Alicia! Your support and comments mean everything to me! <3
> 
> Also thank you to my amazing friend for reading this over and providing feedback.
> 
> All remaining mistakes are mine.
> 
> Chapter title from Say It First by Sam Smith and work title from Not Meant to Be by Theory of a Deadman.
> 
> Enjoy! xx

Patrick lies awake in his bed. He's been trying to sleep for a couple of hours now but in the few short months of their relationship, Patrick has gotten used to falling asleep with David beside him. It's probably far too soon into this for him to be unable to sleep for one night without his...without David in his arms, but his entire body seems to protest that by not allowing him to fall asleep. 

He lets his mind drift back to his mental slip up there; where he'd almost just called David his boyfriend. They have been dating for about three months at this point and things are going amazingly well. After their first night of privacy at Stevie's apartment, David and Patrick had only gotten more eager to spend time together, not only for sex, but just to be with each other in any way. Patrick had began referring to David as his boyfriend in his own mind even before their night at Stevie's, but he knew that it was too soon to say anything. However, here he is weeks later still wondering if they're ever going to say the words and, if he says it first, will it send David running in the opposite direction. He tosses and turns all night before finally giving up and getting out of bed to get ready for the day. 

Once he is heading out he decides to message Stevie because if there's anyone who can talk this through with him, it's her. 

** P: Hey Stevie, any chance you're at work early today? **

_ S: actually took the day off...i can come by the store if u want??  _

_ everything ok?? _

** P: Yeah everything is okay, just have a quick question! **

_ S: k be there in 10 _

He slides his phone back into his pocket and continues walking towards the store. As he approaches the front door of Rose Apothecary, he sees Stevie exiting the café with two take-out cups, one in each hand, heading towards him.

"Morning." She says as she hands him his tea.

"Thank you, and good morning Stevie." Patrick replies, his free hand unlocking the door to the store. He pushes the door open and they both walk inside. 

"Need any help?" Stevie asks as she leans against the counter sipping her coffee.

"Nah I'm good, thanks." Patrick says as he takes a sip of his tea before heading into the back to grab the box of body milk to restock the shelves. Normally, he and David replenish the stock the night before but David had to go back to the motel last night so they had spent what little time they had making out on the couch in the stockroom. Patrick feels the slight blush heat up his cheeks as the memory floods over him.

"So are you gonna ask me or do I have to just like guess what your question is?" Stevie says, deadpan. Patrick turns around to face her and takes a deep breath, stealing himself for the conversation ahead.

"Has David said anything to you...about us? Like...defined what we are?" He asks, biting his lip at the end of the question and letting out a shaky breath.

Stevie takes a deep breath, rolls her eyes, and sets her cup down on the counter before turning to face Patrick again. "Okay, we both know that, and _never_ tell him I said this, we both know that David is smart. It's like scary actually how smart he is sometimes because he doesn't present himself that way but, he's also an oblivious idiot. He has a habit of not knowing a good thing when he has it. He definitely thinks of you as his boyfriend." She says pointedly, giving a firm nod.

Patrick lets out a tiny breath. "I just...I want to say it but I don't want to freak him out. He hasn't told me much but from what I can tell, his past partners haven't been the nicest to him and I just don't want to screw this up Stevie." He says, voice shaking at the end.

"Okay, Patrick, you're not gonna screw this up. You're right, he should probably be the one to say it first so he feels like he has control of the situation...but good fucking luck getting him to," She says and at Patrick's questioning look she continues, "like I said, he's an idiot. He won't say it first because he is afraid you aren't as in this as he is which is fucking ridiculous. Like anyone with eyes can see the way you look at each other...it's gross." 

Patrick smiles softly at that. He knows he has a tendency to look at David with wonder-filled eyes and a soft smile whenever he's just being so...David. He can't help it. "Yeah...I guess you're right. I just wish there was a way to like get him to say it without making a big deal..." Patrick says, returning his attention to the body milk he abandoned when their conversation started.

"I have an idea." Stevie says, the mischievous smirk evident in her voice before he even turns around to see it plastered on her face.

"I'm listening." Patrick replies.

"Okay, you know how he goes on his long-winded tangents and sometimes it causes him to just say things without thinking...I can't guarantee it'll work but it's worth a try." Stevie says, picking her coffee up again and taking a sip.

"That could work." Patrick says, taking the empty box back behind the curtain to the stockroom.

"Worst case scenario, I get some free entertainment out of this." She calls out to him, voice laced with mischief. Patrick laughs in response.

At nine Patrick flips the sign over and takes his place behind the register as Stevie leans on the counter in front of him. "Oh my god! I forgot to show you this!" Stevie says, pulling up the browser on her phone and typing something in.

About half an hour later when David walks in, the two of them are laughing at something else on Patrick's phone. 

"Hi, we're all just hanging out before work? Was there a text chain that I wasn't on or..." David says as he drops his bag down and switches his attention between them both.

Stevie gives Patrick a look and they set to their mission of teasing David in hopes of getting the word 'boyfriend' out of him.

//

This task proves to be harder than either of them thought it'd be. Not only has David tried to hold in his opinions and compromise, but he also spent a lot of the day in the stock room organizing products on the storage shelves and placing vendor orders.

Finally, the day comes to an end and the three of them close the store, and sit around sipping wine.

"You know, I have to say if we hadn't put these babies out there, it's a strong possibility we wouldn't have sold two of them today." Patrick says, holding up a plunger and looking over at Stevie, then David.

"And a brush!" Stevie smirks, looking at David too.

"But at what cost, y'know?" David says with a grimace.

"And the markup on the plungers is actually very good." Patrick says.

"Hm." Stevie hums in agreement.

"Makes me think that we should be taking more products from the back and actually putting them out here." Patrick says, looking at David, waiting for any sort of reaction.

"Mhm...okay no! Nope no no no no no no...no! Fine! I'm terrible at compromise! There, I said it! Like Beyoncé, I excel as a solo artist...and I was also dressed by my mother well into my teens, okay?" David says, his arms gesturing wildly for emphasis.

"Let it out David, let it out!" Stevie says, lifting her wine to her lips and taking a sip.

"I'm sorry that I just know what looks correct! And this situation is not correct. Toilet plungers on display at the front of a store is incorrect! Breath mints where the lip balms should be, not correct!" David is gesturing around the store, voice increasing in pitch as he lets everything out.

"Incorrect." Stevie whispers, looking at Patrick.

"These mountaineering shoes that my boyfriend is wearing looking like Oprah on a Thanksgiving Day hike...incorrect!" David says and turns around to take a breath.

Stevie and Patrick share a look: it finally worked!

"I'm sorry, what did you just say?" Patrick says, a smile pulling at his lips as he looks up at David fondly.

"I said the breath mints need to move." David says, attempting to backtrack over his slip up and hoping that Patrick didn't notice.

"I think it was something about your _boyfriend's_ shoes?" Patrick says, pointedly looking at David.

"Um I don't remember saying that..." David says, a last ditch attempt at pretending he didn't say it.

"Yeah that's what I heard." Stevie says, a smirk on her face.

"Hey if my boyfriend doesn't like the shoes, I can take the shoes off." Patrick says as he reaches over to untie the laces on his right shoe.

"I mean, or not, I don't remember saying it so...you can do whatever you'd like." David says, evidently flustered.

"I think my work here is done." Stevie says, slinging her messenger bag over her shoulder as she stands up. She shoots Patrick a quick smirk as she heads over to the door, picking up a plunger on the way.

"And what work is that exactly?" David asks sarcastically.

"My boyfriend doesn't like the shoes so I'm gonna take the shoes off." Patrick says, smirking at David.

"Okay before you do that, I just wanna let you know that, uh, socked feet in a public place is also incorrect." David says, a tiny smile gracing his lips as he moves closer to Patrick and takes a seat in his lap, wrapping his arms around Patrick's neck.

"We do what we have to do." Patrick replies, his eyes shifting from looking at David's eyes to his lips before David is leaning in and Patrick is meeting him halfway in a soft kiss. Patrick tightens his grip on David's waist and holds him in place as they deepen the kiss. 

When they pull back to take a breath, David rests his forehead against Patrick's and they both sigh happily. Patrick pulls away slightly and opens his eyes to look at his boyfriend, _his_ _boyfriend_! David still has his eyes closed so Patrick slowly lifts a hand up to cradle his face and uses his thumb to gently trace David's cheekbone, urging him to open his eyes.

David inhales shakily before finally opening his eyes and letting his gaze meet Patrick's. "There you are." Patrick whispers, his thumb still tracing David's cheek.

David smiles softly as his lips twist up in that way they do when he's trying to hold back his full smile. He leans in for another soft kiss but they're both smiling too much for it to deepen.

When they pull back again, David looks slightly worried and Patrick can feel his boyfriend’s muscles stiffen with anxious energy. "You okay David?" He asks softly, his hand moving up to scratch at David's hair gently in the way he knows comforts him.

"Mhmyeah...it's just uh, are you okay with...this? Like is this okay with you...like what I said before is that...okay?" David says nervously. Patrick can't help the smile that takes over his face.

"David, I've been waiting for you to call me your boyfriend for weeks. It's absolutely more thank okay with me." Patrick says, smiling fondly at his boyfriend.

"Can I just ask why you wanted me to say it first? I'm not mad, just curious." David asks as he looks into Patrick's eyes again. 

"I know you've been hurt by previous partners and I just wanted to make sure that you had control in this situation and you were able to be as comfortable as possible." Patrick says, expression so sincere that David has to fight the urge to look away.

"Thank you Patrick." David whispers, voice thick with emotion and the words that he hopes he's made evident in his eyes and his arms tight around his boyfriend. From the responding wonder-filled expression and the alarmingly bright smile gracing his face. Patrick pulls David in for another kiss. 

"Come on, my boyfriend deserves some dinner." Patrick smiles and kisses David again once, twice, three times before they both stood up. David took one step towards the door but is pulled back in by Patrick grabbing David's hand and tugging gently until the he has David in his arms and is holding him tightly.

"My boyfriend...mmm I definitely like that." David says, titling his head up as their lips met in a kiss.

"Me too David.” Patrick smiles as he kisses what is quickly becoming 'his spot' on David's neck, then wrapping him in a tight hug again.

This feels right. Wrapped in his boyfriend's arms is where he belongs.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you very much for reading this!!  
> Comments/kudos are a writer's best friend xoxo
> 
> Feel free to come chat with me over on twitter and tumblr (egoanesthesia)!!
> 
> Also, you may have noticed that this work is now going to be more than two parts so if you have any prompts for "steps forward" in their relationship that you'd like to see, please feel free to hit me up with them and I'll do my best!
> 
> I'll end by saying wear your masks, practice social distancing, and remember Black Lives Matter!!
> 
> Cris xoxo

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so so much for reading this!!  
> Comments/kudos are a writer's best friend xoxo
> 
> Chapter 2 will be up shortly!
> 
> Feel free to come chat with me over on twitter (egoanesthesia) and tumblr (endingsenseless)!!
> 
> I'll end by saying wear your masks, practice social distancing, and remember Black Lives Matter!!
> 
> Cris xoxo


End file.
